These days are easily the most stressful days I’ve had in such a long time. There is so much to do and I’m not sure how to properly handle it all. I just want to fast forward to the time when I’ll be in that house with my best friend and things – presumably – will get better.

I’ve been doing a lot of baking in order to keep myself busy in some regard. Today I’m making multiply varieties of jelly swirl breads. I hope that they turn out well. Right now I’m waiting for the first rising of the dough. Soon I’ll be dividing the dough into 16 different pieces, flattening those out and placing various jellies and jams inside. I’ll then roll those up and let them rise in mini-loaf pans.

I’ll then let them rise again for about 30 minutes before baking them into mini-loafs for about 15 minutes.

But that is what I do to prevent myself from breaking down and crying. The stress is overwhelming, I can’t get my mind off of things.

I want a better life for myself and my best friend.